Siri the Would Be Photographer

Most of you don’t know I grew up in Cupertino. Yep, graduated Cupertino High School class of 1970 (Go Pioneers!) Lived in Cupertino back when the big business in town was Mariani Brothers dried fruits. I had the pleasure of visiting again recently, and some of my Apple friends took me over to nearby Santa Cruz to show off some new photographic functions they’ve been working on. Here’s how it went:

Me: Siri, take a picture.

Siri: Here Thawm, I've found 242 things to take a picture of.

Me: Take a picture of the sunset.

Siri: Sure. Take a picture of the sunset. What would you like me to do with the dog in front of the camera?

Me: Silhouette the dog.

Siri: I've chosen an exposure to make the dog a dark silhouette against the sky, should I take the picture, Thawm?

Me: Wait until the dog jumps up to catch the frisbee.

Siri: I’m sorry, Thawm, I don’t see a frisbee.

Me: Wait for it.

Siri: I will wait for a frisbee; do you still want me to take a picture of the dog and the sunset?

Me: Siri, take a picture of the dog, frisbee, and sunset. In fact, start taking pictures when you see a frisbee and stop when the dog has the frisbee.

   [pause]

Siri: I see two frisbees, which frisbee did you want me to take a picture of?

Me: Any frisbee that approaches the dog.

Siri: I’m sorry, Thawm, I don’t understand "apropos the dog." 

Me: Bear, bring me the frisbee!

Siri: I’m sorry I don’t understand “Bearing me the frisbee." 

Me (yelling): Not you Siri; Bear, bring me the frisbee.

Siri: I’m sorry I don’t understand "not new surly beer ring me the fresh bee”

   [pause]

Siri: I no longer see a dog to take a picture of, do you still want me to take a picture of the sunset, Thawm? 


Hmm, looks like they’ve still got some work to do. Of course this is already a bit better than my current camera:

   Me: Nee-con, take a picture.

   Nikon: [silence]

Plus it’s nice to have someone to talk to. It doesn’t matter that Siri doesn’t understand me; no one does. 

text and images © Thom Hogan 2013 -- all rights reserved // @bythom on twitter, hashtags #bythom, #gearophile